notes from the universe

after my dear friend amy mentioned receiving motivational e-mails from 'the universe', i figured i could use a little pick-me-up and a bit of positive thinking a few times a week. i signed up and, though some have been a little bit in left field, today's note gave me reason to pause.

Would you believe, Jill, that there is nothing about your life today, not even what hurts, that you won't eventually appreciate, with happy tears running down your face?
Nothing.
Chokes me up just thinking about it -
The Universe

lately, i have felt that my role as a teacher, as a wife, as a daughter, as a sister, as a friend have all been lacking due this overwhelming feeling of...being sub-par. and, every day, i 'hurt' myself a little bit by focusing on what i wish i had done differently - how i could have been more patient with a struggling child in my class or showed my husband how much he means to me or taken a minute to share my day with a family member or grabbed my phone to tell a friend that i was thinking of them. by focusing on all the things i wished i could have done or wanted to do (but didn't), i am playing into this nagging thought that i need to be more, be better, be everything i want to be/feel i should be all at the same time.
while this may be no revelation to those reading, i am figuring out that i cannot be the perfect ___(insert label)___. try as i might, i am only setting myself up for little pin-pricks of daily 'hurt'. throughout the course of my day/life, there will be moments of 'hurt' caused by things completely outside of myself, so, until those uncontrollable moments come, why should i be a source of pain/unhappiness in my own life? instead of focusing on how disappointed i am that i wasn't the model image of patience/love/friendship, i should delight in what i actually do each day - both the good and the bad.
and maybe, as 'the universe' predicts, i will appreciate it down the road. :)

p.s. as i go back and read my 'note from the universe', i realize that this post took a bit of a detour and went down a slightly different path that doesn't so much correlate to the initial source of bloggie inspiration. so...maybe just read the note, take some positive thoughts from it and then read my post as a separate entity. :)