Sunday, August 27, 2006

tomorrow...:)

tomorrow begins one of the biggest, scariest and most crazy undertakings i have ever taken on.
as of tomorrow morning at 8:40 a.m., i will be a first grade teacher.
over the last few days, i have felt stressed, then calm, then nervous, then prepared, then frazzled...who knows what tomorrow morning will bring. my poor husband tries to tell me it will all be fine and i will be a wonderful teacher. sweet and supportive, huh? i'm lucky to have him...but i kind of wish i really believed him. :)
ready or not...here it comes and i can only be along for the ride, wherever it takes me. whether you pray, meditate, cross fingers, or whatever else can be done to send good thoughts, i would greatly appreciate some headed my way. :)
when i get my act together, i will post pictures of my lovely little first grade classroom...i just have to remember to bring my camera to school. :)
hope you has a blessed week and i will (try to) be updating more often.
~jill :)

Friday, August 11, 2006

fresh

i am pleased to report that this week, which started out kind of 'blah', is ending with fresh outlooks on some aspects of life that were stressing me out or lacking in some way. what a difference a few days makes.
the enormous and messy pile of stuff (desks, computers, chairs, textbooks, paper, teacher editions) in the middle of my new classroom overwhelmed me. every time i walked in, i wondered...what am i going to do with all this - and how can i make this a place where students can actually learn? after a few days of sorting, organizing and rearranging, it's actually starting to look like a classroom. there's still a long way to go...but i now have a fresh start on what was originally daunting.
my dear friend aimee from college came over yesterday. we haven't seen eachother since my wedding and all phone calls since then have just been too brief. she is also venturing out into the world of first year teaching and it was nice to talk with someone who shared my "oh my gosh - i have no idea what i am doing! how could anyone hire me???" we were able to discuss our worry and nervousness and excitement about it...and also catch up on the important stuff, like what's happened in both our lives for the last three months. she is such an encouragement to me and just spending some time with her and talking through it all helped me to release some of my worries over the coming school year and take it as it comes. :) (i'll let you know how this 'take it as it comes' thing goes)
matt and i attended a church in fremont (about 40 miles from our apt) with some good friends of ours from poly. we were heading to fremont on wednesdays (for youth group) and sundays (for chruch services). basically, this was a lot of driving and attending church/youth group was kind of draining...not because of the things that happened once we were there, but because in order to get there, it required enduring bay area traffic. not fun. anywho, after lots of talking, we decided to find a new church closer to home. we were nervous because we had no idea where to go and meeting new people can be hard because neither of us is the super outgoing type. luckily, a coworker of matt's recommended the church he attended. we attended and we love it. we tagged along to a buble study wednesday and, once again, were a little nervous. but we felt comfortable and welcome in this new group and we're excited to continue. what seemed negative (leaving people and a church we loved) gave way to this new beginning...with less impact on our gas tanks. :)
this weekend we're going to rocklin - yay! i miss my family and am excited to see them and go to the state fair. it will probably be a million degrees, but the fair is always a fun place to be. i'll try to bring the camera and, maybe if we take any funny pictures i'll post about the california state fair. any requests for pictures? mullets? livestock? deep-fried twinkies? let me know. :)
happy friday and have a blessed weekend.
~jill :)

apologies for the lack of structure and order to this post...just had a lot to put down and didn't want to muddy it up with transitional sentences :)

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

funk

do you ever have a day (or days) where you just feel...blah? it's not sad or angry or anything for that matter - just blah. there isn't one tangible, identifiable reason to explain it, but it's there nonetheless. when this happens to me, i call it a funk. unfortunately for those individuals who i come into contact with, i am currently going through one of these funks. and i'm sure that i am just a delight to be around. ;)
what makes this a not-so-great place to be, emotionally, is that i can't just pinpoint what needs to be changed in order to break through the blah's. things with matt are good and i appreciate him wanting to do the 'man thing' of fixing my problems. but without being able to articulate how he can be mr. fix-it, he can't do anything. also, the school year is around the corner and, if anything, i am getting even more excited to start this new adventure i've been anticipating since march. and, on top of all that goodness, matt and i are lucky enough to be spending the weekend with my family, which will be a nice opportunity to visit before the busy-ness of 'real life'. as i write this, i am getting frustrated with myself for wallowing in this funk when the major aspects of my life are good overall.
i'm not sure what this post is...an outlet to share my thoughts...a request for anyone that relates...an invitation for funk remedies...i'm not sure. i'll just write it down and put it out there. and by the next time i post, i'm sure this funk will be long gone. :)
thanks for reading...happy wednesday.
~jill :)

Thursday, August 03, 2006

bits of happiness :)

august is off to a wonderful start and i just felt like dociumenting it...because there's no telling how august will conclude. hopefully the first graders won't drive me crazy. :)
some things that have brought me smiles and bits of happiness the past few days are:
  • playing our own version of frisbee golf at the park with matt
  • drinking snapple raspberry white tea - baby white tea leaves sure are refreshing. :)
  • talking with matt - from serious to silly and everywhere in between
  • enjoying the hot tub in our complex - i love the bubbly tub :)
  • new pictures of family/friends/favorite things on our walls
  • generic orange creamsicles
  • catching up with an old friend from slo
  • the smell of banana bread wafting from my kitchen...yum

other than these little things...life has been pretty low-key. no work means i am a little bored during the day, but i always fill it with something. i've probably read more books over the summer than i did throughout college (reading books for fun, not class, that is). these days will be gone soon...so i should enjoy the free time to enjoy books, baking and being 'bored'. hopefully this little post will make other people happy and think about what makes them smile - i know i always like reading what people i care about are jazzed about. happy thursday all.

~jill